Brand New Industries

Wouldn't it be quite akward if the human hand could get pregnant. Guys could get their own hands pregnant. They would have to where gloves everytime they bated it. How embarrsing. Getting yourslef pregnant I mean... Its like getting mono, and having to tell people it was not from making out with some hottie, but sharing your best friends soda.
Well if there was some sort of evolutionary mutation that allowed the male hand to reproduce I would quickly capitalize to make as much money as possible. New Industries I would create would include:
Hand offspring abortions (This would be the same process as getting a wax model of your hand at disney world or the board walk.)
Hand Jazzercise class (cross breed between Siberian thumb wreslting and Brazilian finger pointing)
Hand condoms (latex gloves that come with recycled bazooka joe cartoons)
Hand rape whistles ( It would be more of a snap then a whistle)
Hand Mumus (because nine months is too long to have a fat cow-like hand)