Premeditated

I watched him do it. I sat idly by while the events unfolded before my eyes. The philosophy teacher asked if anyone had any questions. That son of a bee shot his hand into the air. Words filled up in his cheeks and when his jaws opened they fell out. He said, I don't have any questions now, but can I contact you at any time if I have any problems. The teacher responded, what kind of problems would you need to contact me about. The kid smirked and declared, um I don't know, a philosophical crisis. No one laughed. That son of a bee. The teacher nodded his head up an down and went on with the lesson.
I know that kid woke up early, like at seven or something. I know he stood in front of a mirror and practiced saying this averge one liner over and over again. Ate a full breakfast so hunger would not distract him from the mission. He probably drank plenty of water to clear his throat. Maybe he ran around the track a couple times to be more in shape so breathing patterns would not get in the way.
I could have been a hero, but I just sat and watched. I could have stood on my desk. And said, "shut the fuck up". Leave Atlanta, go back whatever lame New Jersey enclave that spit you out. Go back and start an extensive state university system in New Jersey to keep your kind away from the normals.
Then the other students would reward me with loving adulation. The teacher would have said, you know what you brave student who I have not bothered to learn the name of, you're absolutely right. As a teacher I should control this kind of behavior less this creature reproduces and spawns generations that infect the class rooms with hackneyed premeditated one liners. Then the teacher would fail the kid and he would start crying profusely. Soon the Emory police would come to take the kid away.
The teacher would give me the A. I would make love to the orifice of my choice, with the most attractive-best-personalitied girl sitting next to me. They might have an expose about me in the wheel (my schools newspaper). Maybe I could even get to meet former presdient and current humanitarian Jimmy Carter.
But none of that will happen, because i did nothing. Now I know what it feels like to be in Germany 1939 and not say anything during krystalnacht. Shattered glass and a broken future. So readers, do not follow my silent tongue. Like Don Cheedle says on MTVU segments, change starts with students. Be a catalyst for change and put an end to day-ruiners who interupt class with humorless jokes.